All I know is that I don't know.
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Saturday, July 06, 2002
I really want someone to develop some sort of implant that would enable me to record my dreams, cuz they're fucking cool.

Here's the one I remember most clearly:

It was set in the future. One that looked all happy, but was really dystopian underneath. Apparently, I somehow got wise to some sort of conspiracy, and, along with some street-wise girl, had to bring the system down. Much of the action took place in an airport. Lots of running in crowds and such. And laser guns. Good special effects, too. My internal studio let me do what I wanted without concern for budget. I'm not sure what the conspiracy involved, but, doubtless it was a Bad Thing. Anyway, after finding the landmark that was actually the only way to shut down the world-wide computer system that kept the bad guys in power, I was joined by this guy who looked like Kif from "Futurama", if he were real. I had been trying to kill him, but, found out that he was the key to stopping the bad guys. "Are you a human?" I asked him. "I am what you become when there's nothing left to do," was his cryptic reply. After shutting down the computer, apparently, I found myself in Heaven. Heaven was not at all what I expected. No pearly gates or anything like that. Instead, it was time for oreintation. St. Peter (presumably) was getting mighty frustrated with the shenannigans of 2 of the members of the class. They were monkeying around with sponges in their mouths. These sponges were meant for something else, but I'm not sure what. To get into Heaven, we had to sing a song about what we did on Earth. Apparently, I was a surgeon, and sang a song about that while letting everyone else slice me with scalpels. I was then inside my apartment in Heaven. Kind of a dive, really, but it was still pretty cool. Like, if you broke something, it would heal. I smashed a door with a meat cleaver that I found, and the door healed itself. I left the meat cleaver in the door, and it healed around it. I ripped the meat cleaver out, and the door healed itself again. I cut the telephone cord, and, I had to put the sliced ends near each other, but, again, they healed themselves. I didn't try cutting off my feet though, just in case. It turned out that my great-grandparents outlived me, which is odd, since I know for a fact that they have both passed away. Another odd thing is that in Heaven, I had to live with my sister, who was wearing shoes that made her feet invisible.

The inside of my head is wack.

Comments by: YACCS